If Lyrics
If I was your tv Id be like look at me
If I was a shooting star Id be like peace!
If I was a fat bitches thong Id be like hell naw!
If I was a hotties thong Id be like awwww...
If I was a cuss word Id just be like fuck
If I was a rock on the moon Id be chillin like sup?
If I was a butthole Id just be an exit
If I was the d.o.c. Id be like man this is bullshit
If I was the tires on your car Id be like neeeaaawww
If I was the bumper on your car Id be like aww fuck
If I was a balloon Id be like pap
If I was allysa milano Id be fucking joe bruce
If I was a radio dj Id probably say the point 103
If I was a richy ass bitch Id be like umm...ok
If I was spin magazine Id put me on the cover and be like fuck us! and
I wont read this, even us motherfucker!
If I was your mental stress Id be catching up
If I was your headaches every now and then Id be like thonnnkk!!
If I was your tongue Id be hating your teeth Id be like man why do
You try to bite me every time we try to eat?
If I was a chair Id be like sit here
If I was kid rock Id cut my feathered wolf hair
If I was your muffler Id be like shhh, quietly
If I was a price tag Id be like you aint buying me
If I was a fresh ass dj Id be like [records scratch]
If I was jam master j Id be like [records scratch]
If I was a cheap clock radio Id be like [static]
Tune that motherfucker in
If I was barry white Id be like what up yall?
If I was nipple in the cold Id be like boing
If I was your dead uncle Id be like .....
If I was a raindrop Id just be like drip
And if I had an ax to your neck I might say chop!
[chorus]
If I was, if I was, but Ill never be
If I was, if I was, but Ill never be
If I was, if I was, but Ill never be
If I was, if I was, but Ill never be
If I was, if I was, but youre killing me
If I was, if I was. but youre killing me
If I was a faygo at one of our shows, Id fly through the air into and
Ocean of juggalos
If I was andre the giant this is how Id be talking
If I was father mc Id be like now what happened?
If I was a mirror, Id find another mirror
And look each other dead in the eye, crystal clear
If I was a slider Id slide out your butt
Id be floatin in your toilet lookin at you like what?
If I was a pilot Id be like this is air traffic control
If I was john denver Id be like nooooooo!!!!
If I was a switch Id be like flick me, yoo-hoo
If I was a london cop car Id be like wee-oop wee-oop
If I was chewbacca Id get a fresh ass fade
If I was vanilla ice Id be like fuck yall. Im still paid
If I was a stop sign Id just be like stop
If I was your wooden leg Id still be giving you the hip-hop
[chorus}
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Insane Clown Posse - If Lyrics
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